


Our Knowledge of Life is Limited to Death

by LiteratureNerd



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora and Catra try to move on, Angst, F/F, Future, Hurt/Comfort, a little bit of smut, the war is over
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-26
Updated: 2019-04-26
Packaged: 2020-02-04 19:51:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18611356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiteratureNerd/pseuds/LiteratureNerd
Summary: When a war ends, what happens to those who have never known a life outside of training, fighting... and killing? Catra and Adora are closer than ever, but they can't forget the past.Heroes? No. They weren't heroes.They were victims.





	Our Knowledge of Life is Limited to Death

**Author's Note:**

> The title is a quote from the German book Im Westen Nichts Neues (All Quiet on the Western Front) written by 1st World War veteran Erich Maria Remarque. There are two more quotes in this one-shot (cursive). It's a book I value a lot and I hope you enjoy this story.

When the fireworks went off, Catra and Adora were reminded of the worst times in their short lives. With the explosions everything came back… the smell of blood, the sound of breaking bones, dying soldiers… Both Catra and Adora didn’t see themselves as war heroes. As special people. They saw themselves as victims.  
When they were just teenagers, barely out of puberty, they were forced to fight in a war on opposite ends, not knowing if the other would live until their next fight. Catra and Adora… just like so many others… they were broken. A broken generation of young adults who knew nothing about this world but war and fighting. 

_“We're no longer young men. We've lost any desire to conquer the world. We are refugees. We are fleeing from ourselves. From our lives. We were eighteen years old, and we had just begun to love the world and to love being in it; but we had to shoot at it. The first shell to land went straight for our hearts. We've been cut off from real action, from getting on, from progress. We don't believe in those things any more; we believe in the war.”_

“Catra.” It was neither a question nor a statement. Adora simply wanted to make sure that Catra was still there. Catra’s tail was curled around her waist and twitched slightly, Adora leaned her head against the former Horde soldier’s shoulder. 

“They will never understand what we went through.” Adora’s voice was soft but filled with hurt. Without her advanced hearing Catra wouldn’t have understood her. Again she didn’t say anything. “All of them had something to look forward to after the war ended. The adults went back to their old lives, and the others? Mermista, Glimmer, Bow… all of them remember a life before the war, they experienced happy childhoods, even if that time was short.” A sigh, Adora was right. The other princesses hadn’t been trained as children, they’ve had choices whether they wanted to fight or not, but Adora and Catra? They had been child soldiers.

Catra gently nuzzled the taller one’s neck now and purred quietly. Adora felt a familiar warmth in her stomach and wrapped her arm around the trembling young woman who was more than just a friend to her. “We didn’t have that luxury… “ 

Another firework went off and the young feline hissed, her fur bristled and her ears drooped. Adora shivered and tightened her grip around her. The sound of celebrations around them sounded like people fighting and the two former soldiers felt like they would never belong into this peaceful world. Adora still slept with a knife under her pillow, Catra would wake up everytime someone moved past their room. 

“Catra!” The blonde princess sniffled, what had they ever done to deserve such a fate? Years after the defeat of Shadow Weaver Catra still woke up in the middle of the night, screaming in fear and panic. Adora wasn’t able to forget the sight of Hordak’s lifeless, blood-soaked body after she had taken his life with the very sword that was supposed to protect all life. Because of her the Sword of Protection had been covered in blood. 

Again another firework went off and the half-cat hissed out of reflex, causing the blonde to snap out of her thoughts. Adora sighed and traced the fine fur on her ears, causing her to relax a little bit. Adora was the only one who could get Catra to let down her guard like this. Suddenly the blonde shifted and pulled the feline into her lap, hugging her tightly. 

“Do you trust me?” Catra nodded faintly. Her back was pressed against Adora’s chest and she tried to relax. Around them the sound of celebretations became overwhelming and irritating. “It’s okay to let go every now and then…” Adora carefully caressed the fur just above the waistline of Catra’s pants. She felt the tight muscles twitch and Catra took a sharp breath before wrapping her fluffy tail around Adora’s leg. 

Catra wanted to trust Adora. She really did, so why was it just so hard? 

_“I am young, I am twenty years old; yet I know nothing of life but despair, death, fear, and fatuous superficiality cast over an abyss of sorrow. I see how peoples are set against one another, and in silence, unknowingly, foolishly, obediently, innocently slay one another.”_

“Sssh… relax…” Adora was whispering into her sensitive ear which twitched in response. Adora almost chuckled, her ears were some of her favorite parts of Catra. “I got you. Let me take care of you…”

If there was one person in the whole world, then it was Adora. They had been through so much, growing up in the Horde had never been easy. They trained together, slept together, cried together… they had shared everything with each other. Now, years later after finally leaving everything of their past behind except for their fears, Catra was glad that they were able to share the same love. 

The blonde’s hand suddenly slipped underneath the feline’s shirt, moving slowly upwards until she reached her chest. Catra sighed, arching a bit into the soft and gentle touch. Adora’s hand was calloused from training and years of fighting in a war. Catra didn’t mind. She felt her breath quicken a bit and her ears flattened. They stayed like this for a few long moments, Adora just caressing the other young woman’s soft fur while Catra had to concentrate to not just start purring. 

After the blonde princess was sure Catra was completely at ease she decided to take it a bit further. While her left palm continued to take care of the feline’s chest, her right one rested just a bit above her pants. She easily opened the worn belt, Catra still wore the one she had been given in the Horde, but the emblem was a different one now. 

When Adora’s hand finally slipped under the fabric, the feline’s breath hitched. From her position behind her, the blonde couldn’t see Catra’s face, but from past experience she knew that it was flushed. Her eyes probably closed and her mouth just slightly opened. Adora wasn’t teasing, this was not passion or for fun, this was comfort. To show that they were there for each other.

“A-Adora…” Catra sighed and the blonde smiled. A faint blush covered her own cheeks when Catra grew impatient, her moans and little gasps getting louder. “Sssh, I got you. Just let go.”

And Catra did just that.

\- - - - - - -

From the moment she was born and opened her eyes for the first time, Catra had to fight. 

The Horde had won against the magicats, Half-Moon was burning... the little kitten was covered in blood and dirt. It was crying, her tiny paws tried to keep an equally bloody mask close while it had wrapped her tail around itself. The sound of exploding bombs hurt its sensitive ears. A Horde soldier looked at the useless creature and picked it up by the scruff of its furry neck, it started to cry and meow louder. "The last of the magicats.", he said with a huff, no emotions in his voice. "I should leave you here to die with the rest of your species..." The soldier dropped the kitten, it tried to curl up around the mask and he kicked it. Instead of crying louder, two mismatched colored eyes looked up and tiny but sharp fangs were visible. The kitten hissed angrily and tried to dig her tiny claws into the man’s boots. It wasn’t very effective, but suddenly... he smiled. "A fighter?" He picked the hissing kitten up again, its fur was dirty and wet from slowly drying blood. "Very well, Catra. I’ll give you the chance to prove your worth to our Lord Hordak."

From the moment she was born, Catra had been nothing. There was no time to relax, only to fight. Unless she was with Adora.

“Hey, Adora?” The blonde tightened her embrace slightly to show her girlfriend that she had her attention. She smiled a little, those two words just showed how far they had come in their relationship. Catra was still a bit out of breath, but she seemed relaxed and calmer. It was like the celebrations in the background had almost stopped bothering her. Almost.

“Do you think we will ever… be ok?” She asked timidly and Adora almost hadn’t understood her. “I don’t know.” The blonde answered, her voice just as small. “I really don’t know…”

When Adora had picked up the sword for the first time to become She-ra and defended a bunch of innocent people against the Horde, everyone thanked her.

At that time everyone had celebrated her as a hero.

No.

Adora wasn’t a hero. She was no more a hero than Catra was.

They had been teenagers who had been forced to kill, just to survive. 

And they had never been given a choice.

 

Their knowledge of life… was limited to death.

**Author's Note:**

> After watching season two all I have to say is... PLEASE LET THEM BE HAPPY!!


End file.
